Saturday, February 19, 2005

A Little Bit About Myself

Blogging is definitely an ego-driven hobby. People blog because they like gaining the respect of others. Me, I blog because I have unresolved popularity issues from Junior High. I thought that if I wore the "right" clothes and makeup and said and did the "right" stuff, that people would quit making fun of me and like me. But it only made it worse-- they just found something else to criticize. One comment was "Cute purse. Too bad it's on her." They hated me because I was smart. They hated me because I was funny. They hated me because they could. They even called me "Rutabaga" because I had moved from Utah, even though I explained to them that rutabagas aren't usually associated with Utah. (Explaining just made it worse.) And after a while I just gave up. I quit shaving my legs all the time because it didn't help. I quit wearing makeup because it didn't help either. I just wore whatever I wanted, because no matter what I wore they didn't like it.

That's why I like blogging. Not because people don't hate me, but because more of them like me for being smart and funny and existing as myself in a world full of people who are all different by nature. It's vindication for all those times that Lauren with her C-cup bra made fun of me for being small-busted (take that, Lauren! Mine are way bigger than yours now!), revenge on Karen who told me she didn't want to be seen hanging out with me any more because people in her 5th period class were laughing at her (now people link to me!), and retaliation on Kim who xeroxed my private letter and spread it around school (now people praise me for my viewpoints!) And the best part is, I can blog with no makeup on and with my legs unshaven, and nobody cares!

You all do like me, right?