Tuesday, October 05, 2004

Faith

Every so often I feel the lack of a particular spiritual quality in my life more keenly than all the others I'm lacking in. This summer it's been faith. How much faith do I really have in the Lord? Oh, sure, I have faith that the Lord could move mountains if He wanted to. But do I have faith that He can move itty bitty piles of dirt, so to speak, in my own life?

I've known for a long time that for the sake of my family I ought to quit working and stay home full-time. Favorite Husband's job pays just barely enough for us to get by (without paying down our debts). When Bagel was born it was bad for us financially. We'd saved up some money to get us through the summer, but it had to be spent on repairing a water-damaged wall in our house instead. It was so tempting to drag myself back to work like I did after Tiny Princess and Sonshine were born, but this time I decided I ought to have more faith in the Lord's ability to make this work out.

And so far, it has. We've been able to pay all our bills, even if some of them are a bit late. I've been able to start up my business, which I hope will start bringing in a bunch of money by next summer.

It's been really difficult, though. It is a real challenge for me to trust the Lord to take care of financial issues. This past Sunday was the first Sunday I've not worked on my merchandise to sell. I've prayed that the Lord would help me to keep the Sabbath day holy by helping me increase production on the remaining days of the week, and the Lord is answering my prayer. Now I just have to have enough faith that the Lord will come through for me.

Scripture of the day: "But without faith shall not anything be shown forth except desolations upon Babylon..." D&C 35:11