Sunday, June 13, 2004

I'm Jealous

Favorite Husband was traveling on business last week, and he passed near his mom's house, so he went to visit her. She diagnosed him with osteoporosis (based on how not-straight his spine was when he was leaning against the counter) and immediately forced him to take two calcium-laden horse pills. (To his credit, though, he only swallowed one of the pills; the other he slipped into his pocket when she wasn't looking.)

Now this would be hilarious if it weren't for the fact that I can't get F.H. to take medicine. I'm a doctor's daughter, so taking medicine when sick is just what people do. F.H. has a family history of his mom forcing various family members to take medicine against their will, whether they are sick or not, even going so far as to sneak it into their food. Because of this, he claims, he won't take medicine even when he's sick. And he means it, too. He will cough until he pukes rather than choke down a shot of cough syrup. I've tried everything from gentle persuasion to outright withholding of marital favors to get him to take medicine when he's sick, but he'd much rather suffer. If he had cancer and there was a one-pill 100% effective no-side-effects cure for cancer, he'd die of cancer before he'd take the pill.

So now I'm jealous. I can't get the guy to take cough syrup for sex, but his mom says "jump" and he's on his way down.