Stuff I Want

I want a door alarm that will allow me to record a message and have it play every time the door opens. This is so I can have the door say "Shut the door. Shut the door. Shut the door." as long as the door is open.

I want this device because otherwise I have to spend all day sitting in the living room saying "Shut the door. Shut the door. Shut the door." every thirty seconds, whenever one of the boys comes into the house. For some reason it has never occurred to them, after weeks of this treatment, that when you walk through a door you must shut it behind you and not leave it open. Maybe if I had an automated system to remind them, I could get something done and still keep the flies and wasps out of the house.

If I can't get that, I'll settle for one of those hydraulic door closers, just so I don't have to kill a wasp every day or change out fly strips. But I'd rather train my boys to shut the damn door themselves, instead of training them that doors shut all by themselves. They already seem to believe that, since the door is always "magically" shut every time they reach it even when they don't shut it themselves.