Thursday, May 27, 2004

Toward More Politically Correct Math

It's been suggested that math is not subject to the trends of political correctness, but I beg to differ. Here are a few suggestions to make geometry more politically correct:

1. Replace a minimum of 10% of the straight lines with lines of different sexual orientations.
2. Do away with the term "obtuse angle" as it carries negative connotations for angles.
3. Because it isn't fair for angles not to be equal, all angles are henceforth equal. Furthermore, all angles are right angles. Since the sum of the angles of a triangle must equal 180 degrees, triangles no longer exist.
4. I was going to say that in the interest of inclusion and fairness of all possibilities, angle-angle-angle, angle-side-side and angle-angle-side were going to be recognized as alternative methods of proving congruence of triangles. But since triangles don't exist, this is a moot point.
5. Formerly, only two points determined a line. From now on, any number of points will be allowed to determine a line, so long as the points love each other.